First — it is with gratitude and a little sense of sadness that I say goodbye to my practice’s Master-level intern of this last year. Haley Fielder is one of those individuals who entered into training having already experienced life challenges and honed some valuable counseling skills as a result. It was so enjoyable to work with her and now that she has graduated, I look forward to being able to refer clients to Haley Fielder LMHC-Associate wherever her future career travels take her. Haley, may all of your grandest dreams come true (and I’m looking forward to Sunday visits)!
Next, a little article I recently stumbled upon at the Gottman Institute site that’s perfect for anyone who is struggling within a relationship of any kind. For some, the piece “4 Mindful Listening Principles to Better Navigate Conflict” will be a basic refresher, and some will find these principles life-changing.
Finally – Welcome Autumn! My favorite time of the year, with all of its transitions, will see me honoring my own self-care and relational needs with visits from family and friends. I hope the season’s changes bring you good things, too.
Most people think of therapy as a one-to-one conversation between client and practitioner. Indeed, that’s what it often looks like — but did you know that Co-Therapy, in which more than one therapist is in the room, has been around for about 50 years?
I am excited to add Haley Fielder to my practice. Her practicum and internship experience is giving me the ability to offer a special form of therapy that I was trained in and have experienced as especially impactful for many clients.
While it’s thought to have been first formed in the United States, Co-Therapy as a practice continues to be predominantly practiced around the world. It’s been found to be particularly influential when clients’ issues arise from perceived differences, for example within personal or work relationships, and in intercultural relations. When therapeutic conversation is offered by two different professionals with diverse personality styles, experiences, career and cultural backgrounds, we believe this may increase each client’s experience of being heard, understood, and cared for, which is vital to the healing and growth process.
Haley is a Masters-level Graduate Student in Clinical Mental Health based in Washington. From her location in Tukwila, she is offering video therapy alongside me (from my office in Lacey) for both individual and relationship sessions. Clients are offered the option of video-based Co-Therapy when they are
feel comfortable disclosing their household income so I can determine their Sliding Scale Fee.
A few benefits of Co-Therapy (sometimes called Co-Counseling) for you to consider:
Possibilities of more ideas generated that could be helpful for you in session
An even more conversational feeling to your session
Knowledge that you are participating in the training of another much-needed mental health practitioner
Cost-savings with a sliding scale fee
If you have any questions about Co-Therapy, please feel free to reach out. We recognize that choosing to have 2 therapists in the room might feel a little uncomfortable or unusual at first — but we’re also confident in the good things that Co-Therapy can bring to your life.
Whew — we made it, y’all! 2022 is here, and we’re all hoping it brings better things for everyone. The past couple of years have been rough and called on us to be in constant adjustment mode.
One of the ways I tried to make things a little better for all was to start taking insurance a year ago. I’ve always used a sliding scale to offer lower fees, even before I became an in-network provider with several insurers. But I was unprepared for the result — so many new clients that it became challenging for existing clients to squeeze a session in without a month-long wait. So I adjusted again — instituted some new policies and scheduling protocols — opening up more space, finally, for all of my existing and a few new clients to be seen in a timely way.
Now that 2022 has begun, I am further adjusting by slowly becoming out-of-network with insurers. The process to de-contract with insurers is slow and lengthy (as is everything with insurance), so it will take several months before I am only seeing clients who are self-pay.
At this time, the insurance that I am discontinuing with is Blue Cross Blue Shield. All clients who are insured by BCBS have plenty of time to talk with me about their options, which include self-pay at my full fee or at sliding scale, as well as referrals to other therapists. As we move through the year, clients who are using Aetna, Optum/United, and Ambetter will be hearing from me about when they can anticipate needing to select from those options.
Also, every client is being asked to read and, if in agreement, sign an updated version of the practice policies. There is an additional piece now, thanks to the Federal No Surprises Act — at first, you’ll just be given a vague document that describes the upcoming Good Faith Estimate (GFE). Until we’re informed differently by the government, only my self-pay clients will be given an individualized GFE, a document that I will create specifically for you and your individual situation. Unless you’re using insurance, you can look for a GFE in your inbox within the next few weeks.
I know that’s a lot of info! Please feel free to contact me directly with any questions or concerns. I’ll do my best to contiue protecting your professional therapeutic relationship with me while honoring the legal requirements of Federal and state laws.
2022 — Let’s do this! (and btw — all the pics you see in my blogposts were taken by me, in & around my world, so YES, I’ve been learning all about snow!)
I’m here (have been since June 2021) in my new home state, Washington. I cannot say enough about how impactful my surroundings are, on my ability to breathe deeply and, from there, to do everything a little better. I hope you are finding space and time to seek and revel in new things. Here are a few pictures of the outside views of the office where I see clients in-person: At the Indigo Therapy Space, located in Lacey, Washington’s Sixth Avenue Center. I am only seeing clients in-person one day a week, and appointments are absolutely required, as are health-protecting masks for now. Until we can all feel more sure of everyone’s safety, most of us will be seeing each other by way of video as usual.
Back from a very long road trip (just about 5,000 miles), I returned feeling refreshed. The drive itself was eventful — my first experience in a major dust storm (me & hundreds of others hunkered down on a major highway for 4 hours), plus a day’s driving carefully through mountainous terrain surrounded by thick smoke from wildfires. My dog (who is a champion traveler!) and I were thrilled to see family after 8 months of quarantining, tested out many a motel bed, and enjoyed chatting with strangers all along the route in rest stops and convenience stores. Masked all the way.
The weeks away from my home/office brought into sharper focus one of my deepest values: time.
It helps that I am a person who enjoys my own company and that I have a faithful canine companion who offers affection and fun. Also, working remotely has given me and many others the ability to continue offering therapy services while looking out of different windows at varied landscapes. I know that I am lucky, and my gratitude is huge.
I like to bring lessons from my time-off back to “regular” life. This go’round, the lesson is about Time itself. So, I’m adjusting my hours of availability to reflect the positive impact of having more open time in my life. Starting in October, I will be offering hours as late as 6:30pm only on Mondays and Wednesdays. If you find scheduling a session challenging, just get in touch with me or my assistant Darbi, and we’ll work together to figure it out.
I encourage you to continually explore what it is you value most in living, and then take steps to bring those values to life with your choices.
On a slightly related note: I want to let everyone know about a new community support group that is forming. It’s for anyone who experiences Dissociative moments and would like to feel free to speak openly with others who “get it.” The group — which is virtual — will be peer-led by a dear colleague, Karrie Hardin, MT-BC, NMT, who is both a mental health professional and a person who experiences dissociation. If you would like to find out more, please see this flyer with contact info and other details. The Dissociation Association – flyer
It’s likely been a rough week for you and those around you. Besides constant streams of news, you’re probably being bombarded with emails from all kinds of companies and organizations letting you know what they are doing to handle this current public health situation. Me, too.
I want to offer another window to see through… It is possible that some “good things” might come from this experience. I’m not dismissing what it feels like/seems like right now. And I also think the best things that might come in the near future from this distressing event depend a whole lot on our intentional, conscious use of the moment.
This idea struck me yesterday after opening yet another email from some company saying that they care so much for their consumers, and here’s how they’re demonstrating that concern… While, yes, these businesses are doing so partly to keep their business going, it’s also been kind of nice to hear so many expressions of “We’re all in this thing together.” There’s never been quite enough of that thought in this world.
So I added these thoughts to my own coping toolbox.
When I start to feel the tension in my neck, shoulders, and back that reflects my mind’s anxiety, I do a few things to restore myself to immune-boosting/restoring relative calm. I invite you to join me:
Imagine each emailed expression of solidarity with humanity as genuine. Take 3 seconds to conjure up images of actual people discussing and then writing those emails. Repeat any words to myself that are calming — things like “We’re going to get through this together. Yes.”
If you wish to add a very brief meditative practice to your immunity-building activities, try this — you can do this virtually anywhere, no need to find any special kind of place or time:
Pull your vision away from any screen that may be in front of you. Let your gaze gently turn toward the ground, but keep your head erect.
Straighten your posture by imagining the very top of your head is connected to the sky and being gently lifted upward. Move your shoulders down and slightly back, causing your chest to rise and move forward a little.
If possible, flatten your feet (in shoes or not) to the ground. If not possible, at least try to uncross your legs and feet, and wiggle your toes.
If possible, raise your arms briefly over your head and reach for the sky. If not, straighten your arms in front of you or down your sides, focusing on opening your hands wide, stretching your fingers. Then release your hands and arms.
While you are doing the above slow, light, gentle movements, take a few slow, deep breaths and think to yourself:
This is a moment in time. And here is another one. And another one.
End your “session” (there’s no magic amount of time — do it as long as you want/can) by thinking to yourself:
We’re all learning to be human, together.
If you feel an immediate sense of dismissive scoffing (“This is BS. This won’t change a thing”), just let the thought be there and then drift away, maybe with a little “mm hm” and a friendly pat to your own head.
And Also…
“Out of an abundance of caution” (there’s a phrase I’ve never heard more in my life than in the past 2 weeks), my Houston office colleagues have instituted some protective policies for our clients. You’ll find it on the wall when you come into the office, or you can download it here. And if you’re seeing me at my office in The Woodlands, feel free to take similar actions (like washing your hands when you arrive), but we haven’t hung the policy on the wall there.
If you have a session scheduled in the next two weeks, please look in your email for a Client Portal link to a document called “In Case of an Emergency During Video or Phone Sessions (Telehealth)” — If you choose to reschedule your in-person session to make it by video or phone, I’m asking that you read over and complete the form before your session. It’s not related to the current public health situation, but is a state requirement of any health care professional (including mental health) to have clients complete such a form.
COVID-19 (a new name for the Coronavirus disease 2019) is teaching us some lessons about anxiety and the impact of feeling prepared for possibilities. I’d like to invite you to join me in feeling empowered by taking meaningful actions to “flatten the curve” (as described in this Scientific American blogpost by Zeynep Tufekci) of a potential crisis.
Anxiety is a normal human response to threats, both perceived and real. If you want to manage your anxiety level and keep it at a healthy reality-based level, you can avoid hyper-sensational news headlines and social media posts, and stick to scientific sources of information.
In addition to reading Scientific American, I am also using the U.S. Centers for Disease Control website to stay updated on the latest numbers and any changes in where COVID-19 has been diagnosed.
Besides staying updated on real news about COVID-19, we’ve taken the usual steps that we do every flu season in our offices: You’ll find plenty of handsoap and water for washing (find out how here–>20-seconds each time — sing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” to time it, and bonus points if you sing it out loud!), as well as alcohol-based hand sanitizer, and of course, loads of tissues. These things are here for you, and your use of them could help keep a whole community healthy. (We even brought in a few more air-cleaning plants, because you never know… and they’re pretty.)
I’d like to encourage you to feel empowered to cancel any scheduled sessions if you or any of your household members are ill. Plus, I will be happy to hold your session appointments by phone or video, too, if you’re feeling up to it.
Finally, listen to those of us who’ve been here, done this: This is not the first virus outbreak to scare everyone into taking better care of themselves. Feeling panic at such times is only human, but it won’t protect you. If anything, panic could bump up your usual amount of stress and decrease your immune system’s response. So, do what you can to know what you must, unplug daily from the media chatter, take a few steps to feel empowered (like the ones mentioned in the Sci American blogpost,) and bring your gaze & focus back, time and again, to the important people and tasks in your life.
Have you noticed that I get bored easily? That’s not really accurate — truth is, I want to experience more than I think any one place can offer. But it sure might seem like I “just can’t stay put”! I hope you’ll reap the benefits of my ongoing search for experiences.
New Houston Office
Some of my Houston clients have had the opportunity to visit in more than one of my office rooms at The Spectrum. Now, as of February, I’ll be in the same room each day — but at a different address: My new Houston office will be located at 3707 Graustark #4, Houston, 77006. We’ll be able to take advantage of the sunlight streaming through century-old windows in this original 4-plex in Montrose, just across Alabama Street from the University of St Thomas and down the way from the Menil Museum. (This office location might make for ideal pre- or post-session date-nights or self-soothing excursions!)
I’ll be sharing #4 with dear colleagues, Sarah & Skeetz, and I’ll be re-adding Tuesdays to my availability. Starting on February 2, you can schedule with me in Houston on Sundays, Tuesdays, and Thursdays.
Affordable Counseling
You may already be acquainted with this project of mine and with my February move, Houston clients will be seen in the new main office of Affordable Counseling Collaborative Associates. In fact, Skeetz Edinger is one ACCA’s counselors, also seeing clients in The Woodlands plus on Graustark Street. Our other therapists are located around Houston and in south Harris and Galveston Counties. If you know people who would like to talk with a counselor but are unable to afford it, please give them ACCA’s phone number (601) 533-8255 where our Administrative Assistant will answer their questions and help them find affordable counseling.
Meet Darbi Lockridge
Speaking of ACCA’s Admin Assistant — you may have already met her when trying to schedule a session with me. Darbi Lockridge assists me in responding to calls, emails, and texts, so I can be sure that everyone who tries to contact me can hear back from someone as soon as possible. Darbi has many years experience working with people from all walks and circumstances, and her natural compassion shines through all of her busy life’s activities. I hope you’ll feel perfectly comfortable interacting with Darbi for your scheduling needs, and she knows when any situation requires contacting me directly.
Raising young humans is always, without a doubt, an emotionally challenging job. It’s been my experience that most parents hope to do at least a few things differently than they recall from their own childhood. When you add to those normal challenges a parent’s strong desire to be better at the job, the pressure can feel overwhelming. Even the best parents aren’t perfect.
And in spite of all the eye-poppingly negative news out there, one really positive trend has been the upswing in understanding about human emotions. (I know, it seems like the topic of human emotions would be so basic that we’d be done learning anything new, but…) What’s more important to teach the kids — free expression or self-control? Is it better to convey a constant sense of calm perfection to them or should they see how you struggle in life as an adult? So many questions! A recent study offers us some insight into how emotional expression or suppression plays a role in children’s well-being.
This article about the study, conducted at Washington State University, is a quick read. It explains the balance that parents need to find between keeping a lid on emotions and coming unglued — in front of the kids. The researchers talk about “emotional residue” — a ‘feeling’ that kids ‘pick up’ from stoic parents who are often sending confusing mixed messages.
The bottom line advice: Let children see how conflicts are handled, from beginning to end, including the related emotions. This is how they’ll learn to handle conflict in their own lives.
The ongoing challenge: Doing the above well requires parents improve their own “EQ” (emotional intelligence), so they’re better able to recognize, understand, express, and settle their own emotions. But that’s for a different blogpost…
Karnilowicz, H. R., Waters, S. F., & Mendes, W. B. (2018). Not in front of the kids: Effects of parental suppression on socialization behaviors during cooperative parent–child interactions. Emotion. Advance online publication. http://dx.doi.org/10.1037/emo0000527
I’m excited to finally be offering meditation classes. But wait, I hear “What do you mean by ‘regular people’??”
I’ve often recommended meditation to clients. And many have let me know that they think meditation might be just great — for someone else. The thought most often expressed: “I can’t make my mind be quiet.” I hear this so often, it’s like the only people who manage to quiet their mind are Super Special, maybe monks or nuns or priests…
I get it. I started my meditation journey more than 20 years ago, and I’m clear that it’s not easy. It’s like exercising a muscle you’ve never used before… not easy at first, and might even feel a little sore, but if you stick with it, little by little… you end up with a stronger muscle and greater ease.
That’s kind of the point of meditation: a stronger mind and greater sense of ease. So — my saying “regular people” is just a nod to this: You don’t have to be Somehow Special in order to benefit from meditating. You just have to stick with it.
This class will cover a lot of ground in a little time:
Each session is only ½ hour long (but I ask participants to arrive 10 minutes early, so 40 minutes total.) You will not be meditating during that whole time!
We’ll cover a ton of stuff: From the historical to the biophysical to the practical. We’ll quite literally practice meditation for anywhere from 2 to 15 minutes.
My goal is to help you become familiar and comfortable with the tool of meditation, so you can practice it on your own, if you want.
After our first 10 learning-filled sessions, not-quite-weekly and taking place over a period of about 3 months, those who wish to move forward will be invited to come later (or stay late after a review class) and focus solely on practicing meditation.
There’s a caveat: This class is only being offered (for now) to my therapy clients. Part of the reason is because I will not be offering conversation during these classes. Rather, these first 10 classes will be me, teaching. Plus a few minutes of all of us, practicing. With only 30 minutes for class, there won’t be much time for Q&A (and sometimes, none at all) and definitely no time for more in-depth discussion. But I will certainly be happy to make myself available during later scheduled sessions for participants.
So, if you happen to be reading this and wondering how to get invited to the meditation classes: Reach out to me directly. Whether that’s by email (tracy@tracymorris.com) or text or voicemail (325-261-3566). Let’s talk and figure out if this class will be right for you. That’s my highest concern, and I’m honored to discuss it with you.
If you have received an invitation from me for this series of classes: Please respond and let me know if you can attend, as soon as possible. I’m excited to get this going so you might benefit before the end-of-year holidays!
Our first class will start the week before Thanksgiving (Thursday, Nov 15) at 9:20am.
The rest of the classes will be on weeks after Thanksgiving:
In Houston office only:
Nov 29
Dec 6
Dec 13
Dec 20
Jan 3
Jan 10
Jan 17
Jan 24
Jan 31
Each session is only $10. As always, you’re welcome to pay by cash, check, or card. You’ll find a basket at the class where you can deposit your payment (or an authorization note, if you’re using a card.)
I’m really looking forward to sharing my meditation journey with you!
My dog (who is a champion traveler!) and I were thrilled to see family after 8 months of quarantining, tested out many a motel bed, and enjoyed chatting with strangers all along the route in rest stops and convenience stores. Masked all the way. 
